So for a while now, I’ve been trying to figure out a couple of things! And last night, over a few drinks( I never get drunk, just saying ), It hit me. Quarter life crisis! I understand that for many of you thats not a thing, but it actually is! I cant quite explain it clearly but I think it feels more like turning 40 at 20. Humanity is subject to time. Our very own existance is answerable to time irrespective of status, material belonging and so forth. We are born into this world with nothing and are bound to leave with nothing at one point in time. And for this reason, we are scared. We are scared of what will happen when that time comes. Is there life after death? Do we reincarnate? Does it all end there? The fact that our time here is limited coupled with the uncertainity that comes with our “end” tunes our brains to think a certain way. The rise of these crises! Quarter Life Crisis (QLC)-funny fact, I thought I had concocted a new term only to discover that it actually already existed.
So we are born, grow up happy and get to a point where we simply dont understand what we have been doing all this time or even what we are going to do for the rest of our time. Depression, Loneliness, Hopelessness all start kicking in. We get lost. Lost in ourselves. With millions of questions running through our minds. Why me? Its all overwhelming! There is nothing sadder that one having to ask themselves, “What is wrong with me?”. As a victim, I discoverd a secret. A weapon like no other! A mentality to move forward. A mindset to steer you where you want to be. It is simple. These Crises are nature´s way of giving us time. Giving us time to take a step back and think. Think and meditate deeply about meaning and purpose. This is time we get to grow. Not physically but emotionally and spiritually. Negative feelings in our lives should not put us down. They should be a source of motivation. Motivation to archive things we only dream about. It should push us forward. “Every cloud has a silver lining”, is not a saying thats very easy to believe most especially if your cloud is a cumulo-nimbus one!!( see what I just did right there?) Point is, its a battle we have to strive to beat. And we can only beat it by seeking the hidden motivation in such situations.
My crisis is simply a lack of achievement. A lack of achievement not in the big things like academics and so fourth but rather in the small things. Matters of the heart. Its that nasty feeling of giving your all, and getting nothing in return. Being the nicest version of yourself, and end up being hated. And baring in mind that time waits for no man, the crisis becomes more pronounced. Maybe hatred is too big a word but its that shortage of reciprocated love that best describes my crisis. But this is only an example. Your crisis could be triggered and best described by something totally different. And to be honest, Its a very bad feeling. Untill recently, I took it for granted. I never knew that matters of the heart could way a whole human down. I literally almost collapsed. And why? That feeling of rejection. That simple.
The big question though, is, What now? What then? This where the secret weapon comes in. Taking time off, looking for the silver lining in your cloud, deriving motivation from it, and pushing forward. When your enemy ( in this case your situation ) sees you waking up every day stronger than before, Trust me, It kills them inside. Even if you fake it. It still has a lasting effect on what you can archieve in the long run. Dont let your crisis weigh you down. Dont give your foes the opportunity to see you down. And everytime you feel down in your crisis, remember that you only feel like that because you are not dead. And that only means that the fact that you are alive is giving you time to catch up on all these shortcomings in your life. Succes, Family, Love, Frienships and Life in general. So keep fighting, and in the end, you will look back and remember a battle well fought and a lesson well learnt.
“Strength comes from struggle. When you learn to see your struggles as opportunities to become stronger, better, wiser, then your thinking shifts from ‘I can’t do this’ to ‘I must do this.”